This is the hardest part of the whole endeavour. I ran 8 miles today and it just about killed me. I have to run over three times as far as that in under 3 months. Next week I have to run even further, and every week for the next ten weeks I have to run significantly further. If I feel like this after a mere 8 miles, how am I going to feel after a 20 mile training run? Pretty unhappy, I should hazard.
I need every ounce of motivation I have to get out there. I know why I’m doing it – for those parents that don’t get to keep their babies, I want to help make a difference – but sometimes I need something more than that to remind me. And right now it honestly feels like my support is at an all-time low. I’m not talking about the money (although sponsoring me is always good!!) – I mean the moral support. Unfortunately it is this stage when I need it the most.. when the end does seem forever away with a ton of horrible training runs in between, when running a relatively short distance takes it out of me. A few people have been wonderful and it is sooooo appreciated, whether it’s leaving a comment on here or even just clicking “Like” on a Facebook status (here’s my Fan Page as a reminder) but they really are a very, very few.
This is the magnitude of what I have ahead of me. Here is my current plan, to be fitted around my two small children, husband, photography, meals (can’t run after a meal, can’t run with no fuel in the tank as it were) and “life”:
Week 1 – 24/01/2010 Long run: 6 miles (last week – first run in 3 months)
Week 2 – 31/01/2010 Long run: 8 miles (today – nearly killed me)
Week 3 – 07/02/2010 Long run: 9 miles
Week 4 – 14/02/2010 Long run: 10 miles (fab way to spend Valentine’s Day)
Week 5 – 21/02/2010 Long run: 12 miles
Week 6 – 28/02/2010 Long run: 14 miles
Week 7 – 07/03/2010 Long run: 16 miles
Week 8 – 14/03/2010 Half marathon at Silverstone – 13.1 miles
Week 9 – 21/03/2010 Long run: 18 miles
Week 10 – 28/03/2010 Long run: 20 miles
Week 11 – 04/04/2010 Long run: 22 miles – the peak of my training distance.
And every week I will also need to go out every Wednesday and Friday for a 4-6 mile run in the cold and dark. On good days it won’t rain or be windy.
Weeks 12-13 are taper weeks, where I cut right down so as to recover in time for the marathon on the 25/04/2010. Week 14 is the marathon itself. A mere 26.2 miles then it’s all over.
As you can see, the marathon itself is the LEAST of my worries. Okay, it’ll be further than I’ve run before, but I do that every week pretty much and it’ll be in a totally supportive atmosphere. Unlike my long and very lonely runs every Sunday, or my scary shorter runs in the dark on weekdays. I’m hopeful I’ll get support on the day but I already have the motivation to run the marathon (or I’d never have put myself in for it!) What I am lacking in is encouragement for this TRAINING. This is the hard and lonely part and the very worst bit is surely right at the start with so much ahead of me and so few achievements behind me. I wish I enjoyed running but I can truthfully say I don’t.. at best it’s okay, most of the time it’s an ordeal. I love the benefits but I really don’t like getting them. Unlike cycling, which I genuinely do enjoy.
Today’s 8 mile run was just dreadful. I was really not in the mood for going out, despite the fact it was sunny to begin with. It’s at times like that when I REALLY need encouragement. I went out, because I have to (and I’ll keep on doing so) but it makes it a lot easier to go out with moral support. I wasn’t cold, but it was hard work. My times were quite a bit slower than normal.. heck, I ran 8 miles back in October and it took me 15 minutes less. I was out there for close to 90 minutes, running continuously. For the last 45 minutes of that, not only was I not enjoying it, it was first uncomfortable and then horribly uncomfortable and heading towards super painful. It felt like running through treacle, especially when there was a head wind. I felt dizzy at times, especially if I had to slow down to run through bushes to avoid large puddles. I got snowed and sleeted on. Some dogs savagely attacked each other just feet from me as I ran past. And when I got home I was too exhausted to even have a shower at first. My blisters are back. My foot arches are sore. I’ve killed my regrowing toenail that I killed last time. I know I am going to ache for the next few days, then I’ll have to go out again on Wednesday evening.
Foolish doesn’t even begin to describe it. I need my head examined. But I am not quitting, whether I get support or not.. I am far too stubborn for that – when I make a promise, I make a promise especially when it comes to other people’s money and charity. It’s just more moral support would make it a lot, well, more tolerable!
